50 Reasons
by dnapolymerase314
Summary: 50 Reasons/Reponses Why I, Thalia Grace Will Never Date You, Apollo, God of…Wimpy Stuff


**50 Reasons/Responses Why I, Thalia Grace Will Never Date You, Apollo, God of…Wimpy Stuff**

1. "No."

2. "You're ugly."

"3. Haven't you heard? I'm a bloody Hunter!" "So?" "Ergh!"

4. "You're too old for me." "But I thought you were immortal?" "Shove off, old man!"

5. "…You're still a pedophile."

6. "Zeus would blast your sorry man-bits to Tartarus."

7. "Don't we have the same father?" "Your point?" "Um, it's a little something called 'incest'".

8. "Please?" "No." "Please?" "No." "PLEASEEE?" "NO."

9. "I hate the sun." "I can buy you sunglasses." "I hate sunglasses." "…"

10. "I'd rather date Mr. D."

11. "I'd rather date Percy."

12. "Hell, I'd rather date _Grover._" "Eww." "My point exactly."

13. "Go away."

14. "But Thalia, I'm hot." "You, my friend are sadly mistaken." "We're friends? That's progress!" "…I lied."

15. "I'd rather date Edward." "But he's not even real!" "Exactly."

16. "I hope you trip on your shoelaces and fall on a dagger's point. Preferably on a poisoned blade."

17. "I hate you. I will always hate you." "Aww, you don't mean that." "Yes I do." "No." "Yes." "No." "Yes." "No." "Yes." "Yes?" "See?" "Damn."

18. "I would rather get onion juice in my eyes than go out with you."

19. "Sorry, I only date guys."

20. "But I'm the God of Music and Poetry!" "That's not very manly…"

21. "I think you're pretty, You should go out with me soon, My haikus are awesome." "There were six syllables in the last line." "_What?_" "You fail."

22. "But I love you!" "…did Aphrodite get drunk again?"

23. "I'm sorry, Apollo. Haven't you heard?" "What?" "I'm with Artemis now." "%^%**?" "Haha just kidding. But seriously, _leave._"

24. "Jason would fry you." "I'm not afraid of that mortal." "Oh but you should be scared of his patron." "Hera? Hahaha – OW!"

25. "I'd rather fall off the lava wall than date you." "Ouch, that was harsh." "Not as harsh as spending time with you."

26. _Stp txting me. i wll nt dte u. _**Bt i luv u! **_Go 2 Hell._

27. ZAP!

28. "Are you a movie or picnic girl?" "Movie." "Great! Now - " "Oh you mean with you? Then I'm more of a: JUMP OFF A CLIFF kind of girl."

29. "What part of 'immortal maiden' do you not understand?"

30. "Sure, why not?" "Really?" "April Fools!"

31. "Even Aphrodite agrees that we shouldn't be together." ":("

32. "I hope the Fates cut your life string soon." "That's rough." "That's life."

33. "Zeus! Apollo's bothering me again!" *BOOM BOOM* "…ouch! You are _such _a daddy's girl!" "Muh haha, I know."

34. "Aren't you supposed to be driving the sun or something?"

35. "I'll tell Artemis that you've been harassing me again." "Ha! Like she could do anything to me!" (SIZZLE) "…owwwwwwwwww." "Girls rule."

36. "Date Annabeth." "She's taken." "Date Clarisse." "She's taken." "Date Silena." "She's dead." "Like your dignity."

37. "I hate blonds." "But isn't Jason blond?" "Good point. I hate blonds who are you."

38. "Hey Apollo, guess what?" "What?" "I have a poem for you!" "Really?" "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Chocolate is sweet, I WILL NEVER DATE YOU!" "Hm…I think you have the wrong rhyme scheme." *facepalm*

39. "What could be better than dating me?" "Lots of things." "Like what?" "Like stabbing myself repeatedly with a dagger."

40. "Date me?" "The Oracle didn't prophesy it. And she never will."

41. "Don't you find my manly features attractive?" "Hmm. What manly features?"

42. "We're like Romeo and Juliet! Forbidden lovers!" "…didn't they both die at the end?" "Way to ruin the romantic moment…"

43. "Soooooo Thalia - " "No." "But - " "No."

44. "No. I have puppies to kick."

45. "I CAN YOU SHOW YOU THE WORLD!" "I don't want to see it." "Damn." **(A/N: lol nigahiga)**

46. "I'd rather hold up the sky than date you."

47. "I think you're beautiful." "Thanks. I don't you think you are."

48. "Apollo, I think you're hot." "REALLY?" "Haha, no."

49. "I HATE YOU. I WILL NEVER DATE YOU. STOP FREAKING ASKING ME BECAUSE I WILL NEVER SAY YES. YOU ARE AN IDIOT WHO HAS RIDICULOUS BLOND GELLED BLOND HAIR THAT IS UGLY AND CRUSTY. I WANT YOU TO CRAWL BACK INTO WHATEVER HOLE YOU CAME FROM AND NEVER SPEAK TO ME EVER AGAIN BECAUSE I WILL NEVER GO OUT WITH YOU!" "You said blond twice…" (Slap!)

50. "Maybe."

**So which was your favorite reason? Mine's either 6 or 27. Review! **


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